#call it a mega ramble post if you will

[arolesbianism]

Oh baby I am getting way to ambitious with my current oni run for someone who's laptop starts screaming anytime it opens steam

[ablobwhowrites]

When I say I NEED that fanfic where reader keeps them in their house I MEAN IT.

(For the first post of this kinda ideas is here. And the second part to this au is here But this is kinda more of explaining the idea of this au that I call: New home sweet home au. And yeah my yap session is starting here rn and some rambles about other stuff too so be warned mega yap session.)

Basically this idea is just ex employee y/n just being like "fuck it" and getting the toys out of the factory and put them at their house and that's was the only plan. Now they got about a shit ton of trauma and injuries and 17 traumatized alive toys who are now living in their house so thats cool.

y/n was a kinda tries to make them feel at home especially after all thats happened and the other toys y/n couldn't save. They try to make the toys they did save feel better and the toys do and well once they feel at home, it's chaotic is the basics of it. And to toys who tries to kill y/n (kinda includes kinda doey for his very understandable crash out but he feels bad for it) try to apologize by trying to be helpful to y/n and trying to protect y/n from anything that tries to hurt them as well. Plus miss delights face was also kinda fixed as y/n tried to fix it with some molding clay but fixed it to the best of their abilities and it's looks good but y/n is trying to get crafty corn to help them with repairing miss delights face because y/n nearly had several heart attacks because of seeing miss delight in the darkness at night when they try to go into the kitchen for a snack.

One night there was robbers who broke into the house once to steal stuff but mommy long legs and catnap heard them and yeah, the robbers ended up being torn apart cause Mommy long legs and catnap ain't going to let their new home and the person who gave them a second chance to die or get robbed (yarnaby ate the evidence). Once y/n was sitting on the couch watching SpongeBob with dogday and basically released the wildest like it went like this.

*y/n and dogday watching SpongeBob*

Y/n: "you know I'm in a metal band and once at a small concert, I was clocked in the head with a phone being thrown on the stage and ended up getting into a fight over a bag of cheeze-it's?"

*Dog day pauses and slowly looks over at y/n, who keeps watching the TV*

Dog day: "what made you remember that while watching SpongeBob!?"

I do imagine that doey (and the rest of the toys) get worried when y/n leaves the house cause like what if something happens and they can't help so they all made a rule that y/n has to call very 30 minutes (or less) and if they don't call in 30 minutes then all hell breaks loose as they all think y/n is dead and never coming back until they do and end up having do Uber eats their groceries for the next 2 weeks. I imagine that y/n has some old game consoles that their parents gave them and some new consoles that y/n doesn't use anymore but they give the toys the old consoles like the Nintendo entertainment or game cube as I do Imagine that if y/n used their new consoles for them. They would flip out cause like all the toys (especially the younger toys) have never seen a advanced game like this as like playtime co was open to 1930 to 1995 so I imagine they only remember the old consoles and I do imagine like doey playing Super Mario Bros on the Nintendo entertainment or any of the toys playing different Nintendo games is just a funny idea for me.

Also imagining that y/n somehow got daddy long legs and baby long legs as well and totally imagining that mommy long legs wearing hair curlers and daddy long legs using some for his mustache cause like you can't tell me they won't do that, maybe even the baby has one for that one strand of hair

But the looming fear of the prototype still is in them. I mean of course the prototype could never leave the factory but with all those materials and what the prototype might be thinking. It's not always out of the question of the prototype will try something like try and leave the factory it's trapped in. Who knows but the toys put all their trust on y/n and y/n has faxed worse and almost got eaten alive by smiling critters and Nightmares critters has weighed on them a bit but could be worse.

(so that's the main basis of this au idea and if you guys like it and want more don't feel shy if you guys wanna request for this au for any ideas or just want more of this. But that's it's for my yap session, please stay safe and drink water!)

[cressidagrey]

The Queen of Romantasy and the Race Car Prince - Chapter 22

Pairing: Lando Norris x Elizabeth "Lizzie" Treshton (Original Character)

Summary:

Elizabeth Treshton—bestselling romantasy author, queen of fae heartbreak, and sworn devotee of a carefully structured routine—never expected her service dog to abandon protocol and diagnose a Formula 1 driver with something. But that’s exactly what happens when Mara the wonder-dog ditches Lizzie’s side to aggressively alert to none other than Lando Norris in the middle of a coffee shop.

Warnings and Notes: 

Mention of epilepsy and service animals. I don't myself suffer from epilepsy, so I asked my IRL friend, who thankfully was nice enough to let me ask her all the questions I could come up with. The rest I asked Reddit. So everything that's wrong...that's totally my fault and not on purpose.

We are wrapping up loose plot threads so: Hungary 2024, WHICH I FIXED (kinda). My questionable understanding of racing strategy? Crocheting.

As always big thanks to @llirawolf , who listens to me ramble

Radio Transcript – Hungarian GP 2024 Driver: Lando Norris (#4, McLaren) Lap: Mid-race, after McLaren undercuts Oscar Piastri

RACE ENGINEER (Will Joseph): “Lando, box this lap. Box, box.”

Lando: “…You’re kidding. You’re actually kidding.”

Will: “Lando, we need to cover the undercut. Box now.”

Lando: “Yeah, I bet we do.”

[Lando enters the pits, swaps to fresh tires, and rejoins ahead of Oscar Piastri.]

Will: “So, uh, we’re seriously doing this? We’re actually undercutting Oscar?”

Will: “Affirm. We need to consolidate track position.”

Lando: “Oh yeah? That’s what we’re calling it? Consolidating?”

Will: “Lando, we’ll discuss later. Focus on your out-lap.”

Lando: “No. I want you to tell me right now why we did that. Because Oscar was ahead. Oscar was faster. So tell me why we just screwed him over. 

Will: “It was the best call for the team.”

Lando: “Oh, was it? Because last I checked, ‘the team’ includes Oscar, and you just threw him under the bus. And for what? Because from where I’m sitting, you just played us against each other for no reason.”

Will: “Lando, we need to manage the race. We’ll discuss later.”

Lando: “No, we’ll discuss now. Because Oscar went to bat for me when it mattered. He stood up when you lot wouldn’t. And this is how you pay him back? By screwing him on strategy?”

Will: “Lando—”

Lando: “I’m giving it back.”

Will: “Lando, we need you to maintain position.”

Lando: “Like hell I do. Tell Oscar I’m lifting into Turn 1.”

Will: “…Understood.”

Lando: Oscar— (lifts off the throttle, lets Oscar pass him back easily before Turn 1) —deserves better than whatever the hell that was.

Will: Lando, we didn’t ask you to do that.

Lando: Yeah? Maybe you should’ve thought about that before you made me the bad guy.

Will: This isn’t necessary—

Lando: No, what wasn’t necessary was playing stupid games with two drivers who actually trust each other. Fix your priorities.

***

Lando Norris – Post-Race Interview | 2024 Hungarian Grand Prix

Interviewer: Lando, P2 today after a tough fight with Lewis Hamilton. It was an intense battle right to the end—how are you feeling?

Lando: Yeah, I feel great! It was a proper race, a hard fight from start to finish, and I loved every second of it. I mean, Lewis is one of the best to ever do it, so going wheel-to-wheel with him like that, having to really work for that P2—it’s what racing is all about. I think we put on a good show today.

Interviewer: We heard some interesting radio messages during the race, especially around the swap with Oscar. Can you talk us through that situation?

Lando: Honestly, I just want to talk about how incredible Oscar was today. He’s been mega all weekend. He got pole, he had insane pace, and to take his first win—it’s so well deserved. I’ve been saying it forever: Oscar is that guy. He’s quick, he’s consistent, and I’m just really happy for him. It’s a huge moment.

Interviewer: Of course, but just to clarify on the swap—there was some tension on the radio. Did that impact your race at all?

Lando: Not really. My focus was on getting the best result for the team and making sure we maximized what we could. At the end of the day, Oscar won fair and square. I had my own battle with Lewis, and that’s where my head was. We went at it for a good chunk of the race, pushing each other to the limit, and I managed to come out on top. That’s what I care about—proper racing on track. That’s what people should be talking about.

Interviewer: Still, there were some discussions about team orders—

Lando: Listen, I’m not interested in making a big deal out of radio messages or politics. What matters is the racing. And today, we had an incredible race. Oscar got his first win, McLaren got a 1-2, I had a great fight with Lewis, and we showed what we’re capable of. That’s what people should be focusing on. That’s what matters.

Interviewer: Fair enough! A brilliant result today. Congratulations, Lando!

Lando: Cheers, mate!

Comments: 

@/F1Fanatic99: Lando just straight-up refusing to engage in drama and instead hyping up Oscar and talking about racing? That’s my driver. 🧡 @/HamiltonGOAT44: Lando vs. Lewis was the battle we all deserved! Absolute class from both of them. @/NorrisNation: Lewis made him work for it, but Lando held his own. That was racing at its finest. @/PiastriP1: Lando literally said “I’m here to race, not talk” and I respect that so much. @/WDCOscar: We should be talking about how good Oscar was today, not team orders drama. Lando gets it. @/DriveToThrive: Lando dodging those drama-baiting questions like he's defending P2 against Lewis Hamilton. @/TeamOrdersSkeptic: I mean, it’s cool that Lando’s focusing on the positives, but McLaren kinda did him dirty, no? @/NotABot23: Maybe, but Lando said he didn’t want a free pass. He’d rather earn his position. @/OscarWins: At the end of the day, Oscar won fair and square. Even Lando said it. @/F1Conspiracies: He’s dodging the team orders talk because he doesn’t want to cause problems, but let’s be real—McLaren needs to sort their priorities. @/AntiTeamOrders: Lando acting like nothing happened when McLaren literally screwed him over lol. @/JustHereForDrama: He’s so media-trained. Wish he would just say what he actually thinks. ↳ @/McLarenStan: Or maybe he actually thinks Oscar deserved the win and doesn’t care about the radio stuff? @/HungaryGP2024: The real headline should be "Lando Norris beats Lewis Hamilton in an on-track battle," not whatever drama people are trying to stir up.

@/GridGossip: “He stood up when you lot wouldn’t.” 👀 Lando, bestie, you can’t just drop that and move on like it’s nothing. ↳ @/McLarenMafia: WHO didn’t have your back, Lando? Say names. ↳ @/F1Conspiracies: I wonder what that is about…and I have the bad feeling it’s the whole Lizzie situation… @/OversteerAndTea: So we’re all just supposed to ignore that Lando basically said McLaren didn’t back him up, huh? @/FormulaWhispers: What was going on behind the scenes that made Lando say that??? ↳ @/InsideThePaddock: Oscar has more backbone than people realize. Him going to bat for Lando is NOT nothing. @/F1InsiderTea: McLaren’s PR team is SWEATING right now. ↳ @/OrangeDrama: Like, are they just hoping we all move on??? Because I have QUESTIONS. @/PitWallMess: Oscar and Lando are such ride-or-dies for each other. It’s everyone else I’m side-eyeing. ↳ @/McLarenMasterplan: We need the full story. Spill, Lando. Spill. @/TeaAndTelemetry: Lando is never that blunt unless something seriously pissed him off. ↳ @/DataDorkF1: Oscar was the only one on his side and Lando made sure we knew it. That says A LOT.

@/DTSWriters: This better be a whole episode in the next Drive to Survive season because I NEED DETAILS.

@/OscarPiastriUpdates: This is the first time in history a driver has voluntarily unfucked a team’s strategy mid-race. Historic behavior.

@/TireDegEnthusiast: McLaren really thought they could manipulate their drivers like chess pieces and Lando just said ‘no ❤️’

@/F1TeaSpiller: This isn’t just about the race. That “Oscar stood up for me this week” line? Oh, Lando’s making a STATEMENT.

@/PurpleSectorStan: The way McLaren’s radio was DEAD SILENT after Lando gave Oscar the place back. They knew they fumbled.

****

The apartment was dimly lit when Lando stepped inside, exhaustion settling deep in his bones. He set his bag down by the door, stretching out his shoulders as he made his way toward the living room. Lizzie was curled up on the couch, her laptop open in front of her, but her fingers weren’t moving across the keyboard. Instead, she was watching him.

"Hey," he said, offering a weary smile as he settled down beside her. Her gaze trailed over him from head to toe, taking in every little detail. He'd never quite appreciated how perceptive she was before.

“Hey,” she said softly.

He leaned back into the couch, closing his eyes and exhaling. For a few moments, silence filled the space between them. He could hear the hum of the laptop’s fan, the distant sound of cars from outside, the sound of their breathing.

Finally, Lizzie spoke. “You were brilliant this weekend.”

He cracked an eye open, looking over at her. She was watching him with something akin to awe, her expression almost reverent. He wasn’t quite sure what he did to warrant that look. “Was I?” he asked, trying for nonchalance but lacking even half of the energy to pull it off.

"McLaren 1-2," she told him softly, one hand reaching out to cup his jaw and he leant into her touch.

Yes. McLaren 1-2.

Not thanks to the team.

"I watched everything," Lizzie admitted quietly. "The radio. The interviews."

Lando inhaled sharply but sighed. "Figured you would," he told her.

She ran her thumb over his cheekbone, a simple touch that made his exhaustion recede just a fraction. "You were incredible," she repeated softly. "Even when you were getting screwed over on strategy and had every reason to be angry, you just..." She exhaled. "You handled it so well. You were incredible."

She hesitated for a moment. "Did...McLaren didn't have your back." It wasn't a question.

It shouldn't surprise him and it didn't. Liz was too smart for her own good. Of course, she would pick up on that. Just like the press had picked up on it, even when he hadn't outright said what it was, that had happened...people weren't dumb. They would put together the pieces into something resembling the truth.

Still.

Lando sighed, running a hand down his face. "Liz-"

She shook her head. "I thought...I don't know, that maybe they just wanted to take their time to handle things after Silverstone. But that's not what happened, is it?" she asked him softly.

Lando clenched his jaw, looking away. He didn't know how to explain it without making her feel worse.

Lizzie’s voice was quieter when she spoke again. “Did they… did they try to stop you from saying anything?”

He swallowed, trying to figure out how to answer. “I-” he stopped, biting his lip. Honesty was the best option, wasn’t it? He took a deep breath.

“They tried. It was...it was a bit of a clusterfuck.”

Lizzie’s breath hitched slightly. “And Oscar?”

Lando huffed a small, almost amused breath. “He blackmailed them.”

Lizzie blinked. “What?”

"He told them that if they didn't release a statement condemning the abuse, he'd go back to tweeting like he did for Alpine," he recounted with a snort.

Lizzie stared at him before bursting into a fit of giggles. She covered her mouth, trying to keep herself from laughing. Her laugh was like music to his ears and some of the tension left him.

He grinned at her. “Yeah. And you know the funniest part?”

Lizzie shook her head, biting down on the edge of her hand to suppress a laugh. She looked adorable like that, her cheeks flushed from her little bout of giggles, and he was struck with the sudden urge to wrap her up in a tight hug. So he did.

She melted into his arms, burying her face against his shoulder, her giggles muffled. It took her a moment to regain her composure, and she gave a little sigh, pulling back just enough to look at him. “What's the funniest part?”

Lando grinned, shaking his head a little. “It worked.”

Lizzie stared at him, mouth parted.

“He actually threatened a multimillionaire team with Twitter,” Lando snickered. “He threatened to unleash an online world war and they caved like that.” He snapped his fingers, making her laugh again.

Lizzie ducked her head, her shoulders shaking with suppressed snickers. “Oh my God.”

Lando laughed helplessly, pulling her back toward him, wrapping his arms around her waist. She was warm, her body pressed flush against his. He took a deep breath, the scent of her filling his nostrils.

Lizzie grew quieter and looked at him. "Did...did they...was it because of me?"

Lando felt something twist in his chest. “What?”

She swallowed. “Did all of this—did they hesitate because of me? Because I’m the one people were targeting?”

Lando immediately reached for her hand, squeezing it tightly. “No. No, Liz, don’t do that. Don’t make this your fault.”

She looked down at their intertwined fingers. “It just�� feels like I made everything harder for you.”

Lando’s grip tightened. “You didn’t. They did. The people who went after you, the ones who treated you like shit—they’re the problem. Not you. Never you.”

Lizzie let out a shaky breath. “I just… I didn’t want this to be a thing. I didn’t want you to have to put out a statement or make it worse—”

“You shouldn’t have to,” Lando interrupted, his voice firmer now. “You shouldn’t have to explain yourself, or justify your existence, or convince people that you’re worthy of basic human decency. That’s not your job.”

Lizzie bit her lip, still looking uncertain.

Lando exhaled. “Liz, Oscar didn’t do that because of you. He did it because it was the right thing to do. Just like I spoke up because it was the right thing to do. And if McLaren didn’t have our backs, then that’s on them. Not on you.”

Lizzie nodded slowly, eyes shining. “I just hate that you had to fight for it.”

Lando lifted her hand to his lips, pressing a kiss to her knuckles. “I’d do it again if I had to.”

Lizzie let out a shaky laugh. “You’re stubborn.”

“You love it.”

She sighed. “I really, really do.”

He shifted a bit, pulling her onto his lap without thinking about it. She came without a second thought, settling on his thighs with ease. He wrapped his arms around her waist lightly, feeling the warmth of her seep into his skin.

She let out another shaky exhale, letting her head drop against his collarbone. He pressed his lips to the top of her head, wanting to soothe the worry out of her.

She felt so small in his arms. It made him want to cling to her, to shield her from the world and all of its bullshit. The urge to protect her was almost overwhelming.

"I made something while you were gone," she admitted, her voice muffled against his shoulder.

Lando quirked an eyebrow. “Oh?”

Lizzie hesitated for a second before reaching behind one of the couch cushions. When she turned back, she was holding something small in her hands—something that made Lando blink in surprise before bursting into laughter.

It was a tiny crochet version of Oscar Piastri.

Complete with a McLaren race suit and a little black and orange Pirelli cap.

Lando took the tiny Oscar from her hands, holding it up to inspect it. “No way.”

Lizzie grinned, a little sheepish. “I was stress-crocheting. And, well… given everything, I thought it was fitting.”

Lando laughed again, shaking his head as he turned the little figure in his hands. “He’s gonna lose his mind when he sees this.”

Lizzie smirked. “You think?”

“Oh, definitely,” Lando said. “He’ll pretend he doesn’t care, but he’ll be secretly obsessed with it.”

Liz looked pleased with herself. She leaned in to get a better look at the little figure in his hand. "I think it might be my best one yet," she told him with a smile.

Lando grinned, gently placing the little crochet Oscar on the coffee table before pulling her close again. Lizzie went easily. She draped her arms around his shoulders, her legs resting on either side of his. She draped herself against him like she always does, her body melting into his.

It had been a long few weeks. But somehow, sitting there with Lizzie—holding something she made with care, thinking about the people who had stood by them—it didn’t feel quite so heavy anymore.

***

Lando should have realised that it was going to happen one of these days.

So he wasn't that surprised, when the door to the McLaren Sim room swung open, and Oscar stepped in with a purpose. He barely acknowledged the engineers outside, his usual easygoing demeanor absent. The door clicked shut behind him, and the air in the room felt heavier.

Lando spun around in his seat, sensing the shift in the atmosphere. Oscar’s eyes pinned him to the spot, laser-focused on his every move. Lando couldn’t quite read the expression on his face, but there was something serious in the set of his jaw and the gleam in his gaze.

“Hey,” Lando said cautiously. “What’s up?”

Oscar folded his arms, leaning against the wall. "I heard the radio."

Lando shifted in his seat, feeling the back of his neck prickle. “Yeah. That.”

Oscar didn't say anything, just watched him with a hawk-like gaze. It was making Lando’s nerves itch.

He cleared his throat, trying to keep his voice even. "So you heard all of it then, huh?"

Oscar nodded, his eyes never leaving Lando’s face. "Yeah. Every word."

Silence fell between them, thick and heavy. Lando fidgeted with the hem of his hoodie, his fingers drumming an anxious rhythm against the fabric. He knew Oscar was waiting for him to say something, but the words felt stuck in his throat.

Lando ran a hand down his face. “Look, mate—”

“I didn’t do anything special.”

Lando blinked, caught off guard by how bluntly Oscar said it. “What?”

Oscar pushed off the wall, shaking his head. “You made it sound like I did something extraordinary, like backing you and Lizzie was some massive thing. But it wasn’t, Lando. It was just the right thing to do.”

Lando didn’t respond right away. Instead, he stared at the dashboard of the sim rig, feeling the weight of the last few weeks pressing on his shoulders. “Look,” he finally said, “whether you think it was special or not, you had my back. And I need you to know that I’d do the same for you. Always.”

Oscar scoffed, almost amused. “I know that.”

“No, I mean it,” Lando insisted, standing up. “What happened in Hungary? That’s not how I want to race you. If I gain a position on you, I want it to be because I overtook you—not because the team screwed you over.”

Oscar raised an eyebrow, the corner of his mouth tugging up into a small smirk. “Are you worried you won’t be able to overtake me without a little help?” he asked, a mocking tone in his voice.

Lando shot him a look. “You know that’s not what I mean, you muppet.”

Oscar rolled his eyes. "You know, It wasn’t exactly hard. Lizzie’s great. And you…” Oscar hesitated before adding, “You’re my teammate. That means something.”

Lando swallowed, something settling in his chest. “Yeah. It does.”

A moment passed, quiet but not tense. Then Lando leaned over, rummaging in his bag. “Anyway, I got you something.”

Oscar raised an eyebrow. “If this is some weird way to thank me, I swear—”

Lando pulled out a red-and-white packet and tossed it over.

Oscar caught it, glancing down. Tim Tams. His eyes immediately lit up. “No way.”

Lando grinned. “Figured your maiden win deserved a proper celebration.”

Oscar inspected the packet like it was the best gift he’d ever received. “Alright. You’re forgiven for embarrassing me on the radio.”

Lando smirked. “Knew that’d do the trick.”

Oscar was already tucking the Tim Tams under his arm when Lando pulled out something else.

“Oh, and—Lizzie made you this.”

He handed over a tiny crochet Oscar, decked out in a McLaren race suit with a perfectly detailed little Pirelli cap.

Oscar stared at it. “She made this?”

Lando nodded. “Yeah. She crochets when she’s stressed. Said she needed something to focus on.”

Oscar turned the tiny figure over in his hands, running a thumb over the stitches. It was absurdly detailed—clearly made with care.

“She really didn’t have to,” he muttered.

Lando shrugged. “You didn’t have to either. But here we are.”

Oscar glanced up, expression unreadable, before slipping the crochet figure into his pocket. “Well,” he said, smirking slightly, “at least I got Tim Tams out of it.”

Lando rolled his eyes. “Never doing anything nice for you again.”

Oscar tore open the packet, popping a biscuit into his mouth. “Sure, mate. Whatever you say.”

***

YouTube Transcript - Belgian Grand Prix Fan Stage 

Interviewer: "Lando, Oscar, after Hungary, there was a lot of speculation about your dynamic, especially with the radio messages and post-race comments. Can you clarify—was there any tension?"

Lando: [shrugging] "We talked. We’re fine."

Oscar: [grinning] "Yeah, Lando even got me Tim Tams and a tiny crochet Oscar, so I think that settles it."

Interviewer: [laughing] "A tiny crochet Oscar?"

Lando: [smirking] "Yeah. Well, technically, Liz got it for him. She crochets when she’s stressed, and I guess Hungary was stressful."

Oscar: [holding up a hand] "For the record, it’s actually very impressive craftsmanship. It even has little details on the race suit."

Lando: [mock serious] "Yeah, she put more effort into it than McLaren did into our strategy."

Oscar: [choking on a laugh] "Jesus, Lando."

Interviewer: [laughing] "Okay, so no hard feelings?"

Lando: [firmly] "Oscar deserved that win."

Oscar: [grinning] "And now I have a tiny yarn version of myself to prove it."

Interviewer: "Alright, good to know things are all settled!"

Comments: 

@/F1Fanatic99: Crochet Oscar is probably better at strategy calls than McLaren. Just saying.

@/GridGossip: Someone better crochet a tiny Lando next so they can be besties IRL and in yarn form.

@/WheelToWheel: If Oscar doesn’t start bringing Crochet Oscar to every race, we’re gonna have a problem.

@/McLarenUpdates: Crochet Oscar is just proof that Lizzie is the best thing to ever happen to the McLaren garage.

@/EpilepsyAwareness: Imagine explaining to someone in 2018 that F1 Fandom would one day be obsessed with a crocheted version of Oscar Piastri.

@/SilverstoneStan: Crochet Oscar is a cultural reset. Every driver needs a tiny yarn version of themselves.

@/SpeedDemon19: New F1 tradition: every race winner gets a crochet version of themselves. Make it happen, FIA.

@/McLarenSuperFan: The fact that Lizzie made that is so cute. She really said 'supporting my boyfriend and his bestie through yarn.

@/MaxsOrangeArmy: Oscar got a trophy AND a tiny crochet version of himself? Peak career moment.

@/PitStopChaos: Lando’s next merch drop better include tiny crochet drivers or I’m rioting.

@/ChaosInTurn1: Lizzie is out here supporting Oscar more than McLaren did. Queen behavior.

@/F1Wifey: McLaren strategists should fear the WAGs, they have more team loyalty than half the pit wall.

@/WheelToWheelGirl: The fact that Lizzie crocheted through the McLaren strategy disaster is sending me. How much yarn do you think she used during Hungary?

@/RacingLogic: Oscar acting like a proud dad over his little crochet Oscar is the most wholesome thing to come out of this entire mess.

@/ToxicMcLarenFan: I NEED TO SEE THE TINY CROCHET OSCAR, PLEASE, OSCAR, I AM BEGGING.

@/SilverstoneElite: McLaren PR scrambling to figure out how to monetize Crochet Oscar as we speak.

@/PaddockInsider: Not Lando shading McLaren’s strategy while handing out handcrafted emotional support Oscars.

@/PitLaneDrama: The way Oscar is so proud of his tiny crochet self… we need a picture IMMEDIATELY.

@/FIAConspiracyTheories: Okay but McLaren better start strategizing as well as Lizzie crochets.

@/FastAndFearless: Petition for Lizzie to start selling crochet F1 drivers because I NEED ONE. @/McLarenPanicDepartment: Lando: ‘She crochets when she’s stressed.’ How much yarn does she go through dating him???@/MaraForPresident: LIZZIE MADE OSCAR A TINY CROCHET OSCAR??? SHE’S THE REAL MVP.

[girlyhornywriter]

Get Milked [1/2]

[Contains Weight Gain, Hucow]

Bethany tried her best to control her breathing and calm herself down as she took stock of her situation: restraints wrapped around her wrists and ankles ensured she didn't move an inch from the strange dentist chair-like piece of furniture she was sitting in; her street clothes had been stripped from her at some point, replaced with a loose grey t-shirt and matching shorts that fortunately allowed her to maintain her modesty; there was a closed doorway to her left, and a set of double-doors to her right through which she could feel a gentle breeze blowing through; she had been feeling somewhat dazed since she woke up, but that feeling was finally fading away, implying that whatever drugs they had hit her with were wearing off.

She had no idea where she was being held, but she had an upsetting level of certainty about who had brought her here. She'd heard all the rumours about the "Happy Cow Dairy" through the web. Nominally, they were just one of the many industrial dairy mega-farms active in the US, providing milk and cream to the public at reasonable prices. If you believed some of the less charitable opinions about them, they were also huge political donors, able to sway regulations and laws to suit their business interests despite the risks to health and safety.

And if you believed some of the really out-there conspiracies...

Bethany wasn't usually one to believe the sort of nonsensical rambling that gets shared by the paranoid and the delusional on social media, but some of the stories about the Happy Cow Dairy were just plausible enough to make her finish reading any post about them that she saw. Mentions of their links to government bio-tech firms, collusion with intelligence agencies, even some gene-editing companies absorbed under their corporate umbrella. This was all just the icing on the cake though - the real story was the number of abductions that had been blamed on them over the past couple of years. It all would have sounded like the usual crank nonsense, except for one shred of proof that had made its way onto the internet. She would never forget what she saw when she finally got her hands on a link to that video...

Back when she had first moved out to the small, rural town in which she currently lived, Bethany had befriended a waitress called Danielle, who worked at the cafe next to her apartment. They were both out-of-towners who didn't really have any close family, so they naturally gravitated towards each other; Danielle would spend half of her shift loitering at Bethany's table, keeping her coffee topped up and letting her vent about what a rough week she'd had. They chatted about everything, from Bethany's insatiable love of all things sweet to Danielle's story about the wicked scar on her eyebrow she'd acquired in a freak rollerblading accident. Her manager didn't seem to appreciate it, but she wasn't technically breaking any rules, so there wasn't much he could do beyond glare at the two of them. But a couple of months ago, Danielle seemed to... Vanish. She was never on shift, the other staff hadn't heard from her, and her manager just shrugged his shoulders when Bethany asked about where she'd gone. She got a bad enough feeling about the whole thing to contact the police about it. They got back to her a couple of weeks later - They'd managed to get in touch with her and confirm she was safe, but beyond that, they couldn't give Bethany any details.

She would have relegated the whole ordeal to Danielle just being weirdly skittish... If not for the contents of the video. It supposedly showed one of Happy Cow Dairy's "top-secret" R&D labs, where they develop new hormone formulas for maximising the milk production of their cows.

Except these weren't cows. These were women.

You could be mistaken for thinking they were cows at first glance. Their size and proportions were definitely far from normal. Lined up on either side of a central walkway, dozens of immensely fat women crouched on their hands and knees, all communally eating from two long metal troughs running parallel to each other for as far as the camera showed. Each face looked dazed as it munched on whatever slop was being served, spilling the stuff all over their triple-chins and onto their massive mammaries. Every now and then, a low, guttural moo would escape from one of the captive women, echoing through the vast hall long after the offending cattle had dipped her head back down into the slop.

The smallest of the "cows" had to be at least 700lbs, and the biggest were too big to even fit fully into frame as the camera passed over them each in turn. Their bellies all scraped along the faux-grass floor as they dragged their immense bulks from one section of the trough to another, seeking out more mouthfuls of the apparently delicious slop. Their breasts looked so big and so heavy, sagging low and also touching the ground as they endlessly leaked thin streams of creamy milk; whatever hormone cocktail those scientists had pumped into these poor girls, it was clearly having its intended effect. Some girls had their enormous breasts hooked up to pumping stations in the far corners of the hall - They panted, moaned and mooed in ecstasy as their overfilled teats were emptied, the milk siphoned off to God-knows-where. Men and women in lab coats wandered casually from cow to cow, making notes into the tablets they were carrying or pointing things out to their lab partners. Compared to the hulking, barely-mobile forms of the cattle-women, these researchers almost looked malnourished.

The video went on for less than a minute, but every frame seemed to last an eternity when Bethany first watched it. It was horrifying... But it was still, at the end of the day, just a video on the internet. It wasn't proof of anything. Sure, Happy Cow Dairy might have a secret lab filled with women who had been halfway transformed into dairy cows. But it was just as likely that somebody with a lot of skill in digital effects had created the whole thing as a hoax, maybe as part of some vendetta against the Dairy for firing them or building a farm over their land. As Bethany had approached the end of the video, she had all but convinced herself that that was the explanation. Just a disgruntled ex-employee, getting back at their old bosses with this wild conspiracy.

She just wished she had closed the video at that point. She could have moved on with her life and laughed at what a gullible fool she had been for digging so deep into all of this nonsense. But she hadn't. She had watched it through to the end. And as the camera panned over the last couple of faces bowing their heads into the half-empty trough, Bethany's heart had skipped a beat.

It was Danielle.

If not for the colour of her hair and the distinctive scar on her eyebrow, Bethany wouldn't have recognised her old friend. Her face was so much rounder and softer, dominated by chubby cheeks and several chins, with a mop of wild, greasy hair framing her once delicate face. She glanced at the camera as it passed over her, not even bothering to pause from sinking her stained mouth into the slop and swallowing a hefty mouthful. She wore no clothes, except for a grey pair of shorts that barely seemed to cover the colossal mountain of ass that now weighed down her rear end. The tag attached to her ear was just legible for a single frame of the video, and Bethany had managed to decipher it.

"DAISY"

Suddenly, Bethany was stirred from her reminiscing by a gentle buzz from the doorway on her left. With a soft click, the door opened to reveal a tall woman wearing a familiar-looking labcoat, and carrying an equally familiar-looking tablet. She wore safety goggles and a facemask, preventing Bethany from seeing what emotions were playing across her face as she stepped into the room and paused in front of the chair that she was constrained to. Was it pity? Curiosity? Excitement? She tried to speak to the scientist, but her words fell on deaf ears - Literally, as the scientist's earplugs prevented her from hearing any more than a gentle hum coming from Bethany's direction. She typed something into the tablet, then walked around to a point behind Bethany that she couldn't see. After some cryptic beeps and buzzing from whatever console was located there, the woman left the room through the same door she had entered by, leaving Bethany alone once again.

Her head sank in defeat as she realised just how bad this was looking. Nobody was going to help her. Whatever these people were going to do to her, she wasn't going to be able to fight it. This was a well-oiled machine, and Bethany's role in it was already decided; anything she could try to do to resist them, they'd probably already thought of and planned for. Her only choice was to hope they made some kind of mistake before they could do her much harm.

As she sat there with her head hanging towards the ground, she noticed something that made her heart sink. The grey outfit she had woken up in...

It was exactly the same shade as the shorts Danielle was wearing in that video.

The console behind her, which had been humming softly since the scientist had left, suddenly came to life, and Bethany could do nothing but watch as a thick rubber tube descended from the ceiling towards her gasping mouth...

[chipistrate]

Welcome to the Grand Opening of Freddy Fazbears Balloon Circus!

After an array of previous undisclosed incidents at the Mega Pizzaplex, ending with the sudden collapsing of the building due to an unexpected earthquake, Fazbear Enterprise has demolished the old mall and rebuilt a new and improved carnival on the property! But just because the attractions above ground have been overhauled, doesn't mean the secrets beneath the surface have magically disappeared.

Reblogs appreciated!

MANY more rambles about this AU under the cut: would much appreciate if you read them, but there's no obligations!

EVERYTHING HERE IS SUBJECT TO CHANGE!! This AU has just been pieced together by my insane ramblings to my friend over the past few days, so everything in it's early stages of development, and this post is being written VERY late while I'm very sleep deprived and just trying to finish it in time to schedule it! If some things are a bit weird or inconsistent then please keep that in mind! Thank you! :D

Gregory, Vanessa, and Freddy all return to the now renovated lot where the Pizzaplex once stood, having been called back two years after their last failed visit too save a long lost friend, too repair their old creation known at the M.X.E.S after it was suddenly and unexplainably shut down again. Upon entering the new-ish carnival, they'll quickly find it hard to safely look for the entrance to the layers below as the friendly mascot suits above chase after them for being unwanted guests.

Above ground, they're hunted by the mascots- new suits built for both performers and endoskeletons to be able to wear. This night, controlled by corrupted endoskeletons, they've been ordered to chase after the intruders by someone lurking below the carnivals ground. As well as finding the littler animatronics, known as Balloon Babies, to be quite the inconvenience.

Below ground, they're hunted by the old Glamrocks, still functional after all this time, and now under a new threats command that's also trying to keep the 3 star family from reaching M.X.E.S; Vannie. Aka, Cassie. Still here in the ruins of it all, waiting for the her perfect moment to lure the family back in and get her revenge for what they did to her all those years ago.

The mascots are the new faces of the Freddy Fazbears Balloon Circus, their costumes built to be worn by both endoskeletons and actors- but in a safer way than the springlock suits. The actors are used during the day for greeting and interacting with guests, putting on performances, etc etc. While the endoskeletons are used at night as a replacement for security guards and STAFF bots, kindly, but forcefully, escorting any intruders off the premises. Under Vannie's control they, of course, are much less kind and gentle with how they "escort" the 3 star fam out of the carnival.

Balloon Babies are smaller, almost Helpy-like animatronics in appearance, built to keep lost and lonely children happy and entertained while waiting for their guardian to arrive. They can't speak, but they can play song, games, sound effects, blow up balloons with their fingertips, etc etc. They found Gregory after he had been forcefully split up from Vanessa and Freddy by the mascots, and upon the family reuniting, the Balloon Babies more annoying feature kicked in: The Emergency Alert System. Whenever a child they are playing with is approached by an odd looking adult or other figure that seems like they could be a potential threat to the child's safety, whether that be a kidnapper, unfit guardian, bully, etc. the Balloon Babies will use their emergency alert system to call one of the mascots over and deal with the threat, kindly guiding the threat away and bringing the kid to a safer area away from potential danger where they can stay with staff until a proper guardian arrives. The Balloon Babies had decided in their time with Gregory that Vanessa and Freddy were unfit guardians for leaving Gregory scared and alone this late at night, and any time Vanessa and/or Freddy is nearby, their alert system will sound off and call a mascot to their location. The problem, other than the obvious, is that the Balloon Babies are fixated on Gregory. They will always be attracted to him and find their way back to him no matter what, with the only exception being when he's under ground. Which means that, until they can find a way to deactivate or otherwise get rid of these guys, Gregory is forced to be split up from Vanessa and Freddy above ground, and regroup underground.

The only exception is Goldie, a soft yellow version of the Freddy Balloon Baby that doesn't follow the others. Goldie is the only one of the Balloon Babies that can go underground, Vannie specifically programming him to be able to do so. He follows Vannie around and provides her with much needed company, being her only real friend down here besides Roxy. Later on, Gregory will find Goldie, but instead of calling for the mascots whenever Vanessa is near, he'll send out a signal to distract the other Balloon Babies away from Gregory so they won't call for the mascots or overwhelm him. Goldie can tell that Vanessa and Freddy are fit guardians that love Gregory very much, and can also tell that they're afraid of the mascots, though he can't compute why- it's his job to make sure that kids and their families are safe, so he's doing his best to ensure their safety however he can. Later on, Vannie will come looking for her friend after a long period of time of him being away and find him with the 3 star family, causing more conflict between the two parties that Goldie can't understand- Cassie and Gregory are supposed to be friends, aren't they? That's what Cassie said. Friends aren't supposed to fight each other, they're supposed to protect each other. That's what Goldie believes, at least.

Random trivia;

-Gregory, Freddy, and Vanessa have been living together for about 3 years now. 1 year by the time of Ruin, and 2 years after the fact leading up to Balloon Circus.

-Cassie has been gaslit into thinking that all the stuff Dr. Rabbit did was actually Gregory himself with no outside influence, only fueling her want for revenge, not only for the elevator incident, but everyone he hurt. This will affect Gregory greatly(he has not 100% recovered and this Does Not Help).

-Cassie still doesn't fully trust the Mimic, despite being under its influence. She let the M.X.E.S stay up after the 3 star family put it back up after Ruin despite Mimic's demands for her to shut it down again, assuring him it was "part of her plan". She wasn't entirely lying, shutting down the M.X.E.S was how she wanted to lure the family back, but she'd be lying if she said it wasn't also partially because she wanted to keep "that old endo" sealed away. He's not completely free from fault either.

-Gregory and Vanessa both have chips implanted in their heads, it's how Dr. Rabbit and Vanny took over way back when. Those same chips gave them VR vision, but the chips have since been "domesticated" and can't go full VR mode anymore. Despite this fact, they do still have a few side effects of the VR vision, such as some walls and objects simply not existing, despite them looking perfectly normal and real. They can phase through them without trouble, and this helps them navigate the Balloon Circus, becauseeeeeee;

-Cassie was there during the construction of the circus and set up VR walls in certain spaces to help her hide out and travel around undetected, even during the day. The 3 star family can also use these now as an easier way of navigating through the circus, but also as a way to hide from the mascots and even sometimes the Balloon Babies.

-The entrance to the underground levels is behind a VR wall, but it's one set up by the construction workers so the patrons wouldn't notice it. The reason an intentional opening is there is because the new entrance is now used as a dumping ground for stuff from random items from the ruins of the Pizzaplex to unused stuff from the circus to anything the employees with access to the area want to throw in there. It's how the ruined Glamrocks ended up there.

-The Glamrocks were being slowly reintroduced to the public, the biggest attraction so far being 'Chica of the Sea', a tent for the underwater hologram show of a prerendered mermaid Glamrock Chica that would swim around, wave at guests, and do a few preset moves that employees could turn on whenever. There's hints of them wanting to reintroduce the others as well that haven't been shown off to the public yet, with the new roles being; Glam Freddy and Bonnie are the co-ringmasters of the main tent where the mascots performances are held, making sure everything runs smoothly. Roxanne is the mascots and glamrocks make up artist, as well as offering to do make up/face paint for any patrons that came by her tent (for a price, of course). And Monty would roam around the circus grounds as a strongman showing off his incredible strength. He also has a tent for this, but he was mostly supposed to roam around and sometimes try and make people swing by his tent, mostly so they would buy his merch.

-Chica being the first to be reintroduced has an effect on her character below ground, with her hearing the news and trying her best to dress herself up in whatever scraps she could find to look like her mermaid counterpart, practicing her singing and dancing despite her condition so she could prove that she could be just as good as the hologram if she just got a few repairs.

-Roxanne is headless, having lost her head in her tussle with the Mimic. But she still has control of both her body and head, carrying around her decapitated head in her arms.

-Vannie/Cassie cares about Goldie soso much that's her new bestie<33 Friendship ended with Gregory, Goldie is new best friend<3 (I'm so sorry Gregory)

-Vannie is also known as Vengeful Vannie, but usually shortened to just 'Vannie'. A callback to the "Vengeful Spirit" aka Cassidy, because I think the parallels between the two are neat<3 (THIS MEANS NOTHING LORE WISE IT'S JUST A NAMING THING.)

-Some of the stuff at Balloon Circus was bought from the carnival mentioned to be across the street from the Pizzaplex in the TFTPP epilogues, and rebranded to fit with the new Fazbear theming

I wanna talk more about these guys later- not sure what else exactly to do with them, but if anybody has any questions then feel free to send 'em to my inbox! I'll be more than happy to reply to the best of my abilities<3

[hopalongfairywren]

HElllo hi i heard you were willing to ramble about egg lore? (<- knows nothing about egg lore but somehow ended up writing a fic about the egg and i need to pay for my sins)

Oh boy. Where do we fucking BEGIN! (This answer will be late and probably go on so many side tangents) Alright, so I'm just gonna recap the "smaller" events leading up to and surrounding the early part of the egg lore first. The Egg arc was so long I could probably make several long posts JUST for recapping the general events that happened in roughly chronological order as well as important tidbits to the egg lore. That's assuming either the ADHD spurred motivation fuel I'm running on while writing this doesn't dry up, or that I get the kind of motivation to write more posts this long from other asks like this. I'll also try to do more seperate posts on the more lore analysis-y side of the egg arc. So like how the egg's story was impacted on a more meta scale by the way the dsmp's story over all was being played out at the time by its' creators, the implications of its existance in both dsmp fanon and canon... IF I'm motivated to that is.

The Egg arc began when c!Badboyhalo found the "egg" in his statue room, which he was digging out to make way from the Dreamon Hunters (totally different lore plot, but that's for another niche dsmpblr blog) He soon showed it to c!Sam and c!Dream, and for context those two had been terraforming a part of the SMP close by the Badlands and therefore the statue room in order for Sam to complete the giant mega prison Dream had hired him to construct.

Bad was immediately drawn to the "egg" (which was called that because of it's shape and not because at that point it was confirmed the thing was an egg), where as both Dream and Sam were immediately weirded out by Bad's sudden affinity for it and the own bad vibes it gave off to both of them. Shortly after leaving the statue room, they spotted red vines growing by first by Hutt's Pizza - and then shortly after at Bad and Skeppy's mansion. This was extra concerning because they reasoned no player could have spread those growths up there on the surface, to those two different locations, in the time they were all down in the cave. This creeped Dream out enough he tried to manually remove the growth at the pizza place. This caused Bad to become agressive and he attacked Dream for 'hurting it', reasoning that the vines were beautiful. And it spread even more rapidly after that, with red vines being spotted growing around Jschlatt's grave, even on the Power Tower in L'manberg. Bad became even more attached to the egg and it's various offshoots, even nicknaming the egg "baby".

At this point most people on the server who interacted with the egg were, understandably were uncomfortable with the rapid spread of the vines and Bad's weird devotion to it. (Execptions to that being c!Puffy, c!Ponk and c!Antfrost who agreed with him) Bad and Ant eventually both started hearing voices from the egg, commanding them to spread the vines even further, while Puffy also started exhibiting the extreme fawning and obsession over the egg at that point. (She nicknamed it Eggy) Bad and Ant actively started spreading the vines; at c!Punz's tower and Sam's base. They also started urging other people to follow them back to where the Egg's main structure was, presumably in order to persuade more people over to becoming obsessed with said Egg. Sam tried putting a stop to this by trying to move the egg's structure physically, but he was stopped by Bad and Ant. The conflict was broken up when Punz came over, and remarked that he found the egg strange but "ultimately harmless." (Punz later elaborated that he was actually neutral on the egg and leaning towards viewing it as a potential threat, but to avoid direct conflict just wanted to see how everything would unfold. He also refused a proposal from Sam to fight Bad and Ant should the need arise.) Ponk was yet another case of someone initially opposing the egg but coming to view it favoriably. He had seemingly mixed opinions for a while, admiring the beauty of the vines but also being creeped out by the degree of devotion Bad, Ant and Puffy were showing to the egg over all. Ponk Eventually went to visit the Egg's main room and actually touched it. Like Bad and Ant, he reported hearing the egg make audible noises. Unlike Sam and Ant, he did not apperantly hear distinct words but rather "growling". Overtime, Ponk started referring to the egg as beautiful as well. Also he too began pushing for Sam to "join the egg" Leaving off here, with the next post (if it happens) being on the canonical timeline of events leading to most of the egg's followers disinfecting at that point, until probably the establishment of the proper eggpire. And then the red banquet of course gets it's own special post.

[audaciousacolyte]

Hi lovely! First of all before I request.. How are you? How have you been? And also, I seriously enjoy your writings, keep up with the good work and ignore all the haters! They're not worth your precious time.

As for the request, could I pleaseeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee request Oswald the lucky Rabbit, Bendy and Cuphead x female reader? Like, how would they be as boyfriend or husband head canons. I hope it's not too much darling! Take all the time you need!

Have fun and have a lovely day/night/morning/evening!! <33

♡ My own Mr. Loverman ♡

Oswald the lucky Rabbit, Bendy and Cuphead x reader romantic partner headcanons (separate)

AN: 《|| Hello!! Thank you so much for requesting!!! I'm doing quite well, but I have been busy trying to figure out what exactly I should write. I'm relieved that you enjoy my silly rambling, and I will gladly bring you more in the future!!! However, I'm terribly sorry that I don't post too often. Please be patient with me ;w; ||》

(Boyfriend/husband headcanons)

Cuphead

♡| Cuphead is not exactly what Someone would call boyfriend material…at first.

♡| He's brash, arrogant, and quite literally has zero self control.

♡| However, the thing that makes him boyfriend material is that while it might not seem like it, he's actually a really sensitive guy.

♡| Cups likes to hide behind bravado and anger, but underneath, he cares deeply about the people around him. He just…doesn't really know how to express that.

♡| By the time you are dating, he will definitely try to communicate this… kinda.

♡| (You had thought he was mad at you for the longest time, but no. He's just awful at communicating his emotions.)

☆| Nobody knows how he managed to land you as a partner, but Bendy theorizes that there may have been witchcraft involved. (Felix disagrees, but only because he thinks that you know something that everyone else doesn't…which like, he's not wrong??)

♡| When he does announce that y'all are dating, it's at the most random moment possible. No context, no elaboration. Just.

♡| Y'all are dating now. 🤷‍♀️

☆| (Boris nearly had a heart attack when he first said it, because he genuinely did not expect it. However this was not as bad as when Mugs demanded that he was to be Cups' best man at the wedding.)

♡| Very spontaneous. I would expect a lot of last minute dates to places neither of you have been before.

☆| (Bro once took you to a monster truck rally for your anniversary. He said it "seemed cooler than I thought it would be", when you asked him about it)

♡| He is not only one of the most loyal men on the planet, but he's also incredibly attentive! Any attention you want is given to you, and Cups is more than happy to cuddle up with you any time of the day.

♡| Casually (cough cough he's so nervous please help cough cough) proposes during your 4 year anniversary with a genuine diamond ring. Literally cries when you say yes.

Bendy

♡| The best boyfriend ever. Send Post.

♡| I'm serious though, Bendy is the sweetest boyfriend to have.

♡| Having a bad day? He'll make sure that you get whatever you need to unwind and feel better.

♡| Want to spend some time together? Of course! He'll go set up a movie for the two of you to watch

♡| Can't open something? Don't worry, honey, he can open it for you (♡♡♡swoon♡♡♡)

♡| Whatever comes, through sickness and in health, Bendy will stay by your side for as long as you allow him to.

♡| Can, will and has done everything in his power to give you everything he thinks that you deserve in a partner. Anything you want, you are going to get it.

♡| (The day he proposes is also the day that Boris got tired of listening to his brother gush about you at 4 in the morning and forced him to go get married or he'd tell Felix their tragic backstory (read, he'd tell Felix to sign the damn adoption papers already))

Oswald the lucky Rabbit

♡| When he does propose, it's at a mega-fancy restaurant, and with an intricately carved golden ring. He won't cry when you say yes, but he gets REAL close.

♡| Whether you realize it or not, the two of you have practically been married for like, ever.

♡| Ever since y'all met, you act just like a married couple with how domestic y'all are with each other.

♡| Love at first sight? Nah, MARRIAGE at first sight

♡| Oswald does not notice this at all. He considers you his best friend, and he (loves you) cares about you a lot, but c'mon guys! there is NO WAY he can be in love with you! He's already in love with Ortensia, you know,HIS WIFE?

♡| (Polyamory exists for a REASON Ozzie)

♡| Ortensia would actually be the one to sit him down and talk to him about it, because you and I KNOW that our poor, sweet, dumb bunny boy won't do anything about this.

◇| (Again, like I've said in Oz's general headcanons, she'll be happy if Oswald's happy and if Oswald wants to start a polycule because he's head over heels for his bestie, then she’s okay with it.)

♡| When he does ask you out, and y'all eventually start going steady, he is such a sweetheart. I am a firm believer in hopeless romantic Oswald, and I will die upon this hill.

♡| Any bit of affection is met with really loud purring, and foot thumping.

☆| (Did you know that rabbits can purr? Yeah, neither did I.)

♡♡♡| He and Ortensia team up and propose to you at the same time with matching silver rings, each with their name carved on the inside. They both tackle-hug you to the ground when you say yes

[neigepomme]

thinking about caleb as the main protagonist in a horror game..

this is just me rambling, so it might be mega incoherent! also it's 4am (5am when i post this) and i can only think of him oops.. mentions of major character death, horror game anon this one goes out to u

the song playing when i wrote this was have a nice life's "a quick one before the eternal worm devours connecticut" (it's a good song guys trust me)

the game would be a silent hill adjacent one — specifically silent hill 2. following your death, he's left to aimlessly work, as an attempt to dull the pain. he knows you would never forgive him if he brought an end to his own life, so as an act of selflessness towards you, he lives. painfully, with the weight of your loss on his shoulders, but he lives.

therapy doesn't work, days off do not work and and socializing is a pain, especially when you're not by his side. he misses the playful banter, and the sight of apples that he once loved reminds him of you. he doesn't find them as sweet as he used to, and the apple soda you used to make him always ends up having a bitter aftertaste, but he figures that it's because you're no longer there to sprinkle love within his drink.

eventually, caleb ends up straying away from things that remind him of you. the door to your room has been closed ever since your passing, and the only piece of you he carries with him is the necklace you gifted him. some days, it feels as if you've shackled him to you, and he gets this need to take it off — only to stop his actions when he touches the clasp.

he's still busy as the farspace fleet's colonel, and even though it won't bring you back, he still finds solace in his work. secretly, he's hoping that when he comes home, you'll come out of your room, but deep down, caleb's well aware that won't happen. he still kisses his necklace before every flight — before, he'd do it as a ritual, but now? it's done in the form of a prayer. he prays to whomever will listen, praying for your happiness wherever you are. he finds comfort in the knowledge that you no longer have to worry about ever and that your heart won't ever bring you pain again.

one day, though, he's assigned to a solo mission in the deepspace tunnel, but everything seems to be going wrong. he was getting sabotaged. the traitors finally got to him. caleb feels as if he was transported back to the DAA, to that day where everything derailed. this time around, though, he had no home to fight for, to go back to.

because you weren't there.

so as he lost control of the aircraft he was sitting in, caleb came to terms with it. with his inevitable demise. he was upset that he couldn't fulfill the promise, but he no longer wanted to fight to live. he just wanted to return to you, to see your smile again, to hold you tightly against him and to inhale the familiar scent of your shampoo. slowly, everything around him comes to a halt, and with a serene expression on his face and one last kiss to his pendant, he blacks out.

imagine his surprise when he comes to, lying on the ground of an oddly familiar planet, of an oddly familiar park. this was the place you remembered him for the first time. and what does he do? he scoffs. the gods must have forsaken him, he thinks. but he can't stop himself from walking around, picking up a metal bar he found lying next to him. just in case.

but that's when he hears it. your laughter.

and not just any laughter, but your childhood one. the giggles of a child, unmistakably you. a sense of panic takes over all of his senses, and he runs in the direction of the sound — any sense of self-preservation long forgotten. through the fog, he calls out your name, and your voice responds, calling out his name from all sides. he's going crazy. caleb's hallucinating, surely. he keeps on looking, though, and that's when he encounters it.

the disfigured, grotesque body of a researcher from the facilities you grew up in. he remembers that watch, that aggravating tick-tock sound that used to grow louder and louder in his ears every time he was experimented on and brought to new pain levels in the laboratory — when the creature leaps in his direction, and he only narrowly misses the hit, he remembers your laughter and curses under his breath. even if your voice is just an illusion, he is determined to hear more of it.

caleb takes a deep breath, the metal bar between his hands feeling heavy. he swings and hits his childhood executioner — only for it to stand back up, more murderous than it had originally been. his evol isn't working here, and all he has is that damn metal bar, so he steadies himself for another hit.

shit.

it just won't die.

he needs to run, but where even?

that's when your laughter resounds again, only this time accompanied by a shout of his name, and he runs. he runs, escaping from the creature and entering a shelter, finally away from the researcher.

something something ghost of his past something something anyways i'm tired if anyone's interested i might elaborate on this.. this is very self-indulgent and just feeding my love for psychological horror games...

[luvmailing]

star stickers and best efforts.

「 tws + notes: no tws, unedited, hurt/comfort but 100% not at all, reader is mildly mean when nervous LIKE A BAD DOG /ref and most definitely written self-indulgently by accident, sun is mildly condescending, they r each others best supporters, mentions of a customer being rude but rly nothing crazy, sun uh... he's an interesting fella, BIGGG dialogue chunks im sorry im sorry 」

「 gn!reader, can be platonic or romantic <3 」

↳ ft. the daycare attendant/sun/sundrop

author's note: my wip title was literally just "the one where you're yelled at" :p but... hiiii!!! obligatory return to fnaf real quick becuz,,, no, i still havent gotten into the ruin dlc but YES i do love sun's personality in help wanted 2..... if this is ooc u can erm. shove me into wet concrete. (。﹏。) aaannywayz!! missed this!!! missed this so much!!!! ( ╯□╰ ) sorry for not valentine's day posting,,, scandalous ik since im lit rally Called Valentine. but oh well. enjoy! or dont. if you dont im sorry please request fnaf stuff so i can Fix That /srs

if you weren't relying on this job to put food on your table and a roof on your head, you’d burn the freddy fazbear’s mega pizzaplex to the ground for a piece of pocket lint and a pat on the head.

maybe it’s a bit dramatic to say that— you're paid well, you like your mostly robot coworkers, and most of the time (emphasis on most and not always) the work is manageable enough.

the customers are another story.

sun notices the minute you walk in the daycare. you look like you're a minor inconvenience away from murder— which naturally, makes him feel inclined to prod a little.

“well, someone’s awfully sulky today!”

while you’d typically crack a smile at the upbeat jester animatronic, his enthusiasm in the face of your misery is grating. there’s no energy left in your body to banter with him— you were using most of it to drag your feet over to the shoe caddy, toolbox in hand to fix up its shelf, now hanging askew due to a busted bracket.

“can it, sunny, i don't wanna hear it.” you mutter, more venomous than you intend it to be. he doesn’t even blink at your grumpiness. instead, he happily holds up the shelf while you inspect it and grab a new bracket to secure it.

at least he’s trying to make himself useful. you think to yourself.

his faceplate tilts slightly, staring at you with that ever present grin. his staring isn’t really helping, but you don’t fault him for it. you’ve gotten used to his antics by now. “woke up on the wrong side of the bed?” sun questions.

you shake your head.

“got yelled at by a customer— now, if you could please just drop the topic—” you sigh exasperatedly, not even bothering to finish the sentence as you sit down cross legged in front of the shoe caddy, slumping slightly in defeat.

much too persistent for his own good, sun decides that inquiring even further about the incident that seems to have you beat down is a good idea. “what’d you do?”

you consider feigning offense as he insinuates it’s somehow your fault. but you don’t. you just shrug it off.

“my job.” 

“ah, they do hate it when you do that.” he tuts.

“it wasn’t even that big of a deal,” you mutter, getting the bracket in place and marking it, “this one kid just so happened to walk up to the arcade machine i was putting an out of order sign on. i felt bad, so like, obviously, i hand the kid a few tokens, apologize politely, explain— and you’d think it’s all good right?”

you pause mid-ramble as you fix up the shelf. in all your misery, you forgot that you don’t even know exactly what caused the shelf to collapse like this. you consider asking.

sun leans in just a bit too close, interrupting your train of thought as you stare at the shelf. when you glance at him, he gives you a little nod.

go on, he seems to say wordlessly. he’s waiting silently for you to continue your story. it’s never not unnerving when he’s quiet.

“...anyways, uh... the kid’s dad came by and got mad or something. didn’t understand why i couldn’t just let him play one game since it looked perfectly functional— keep in mind, this is the arcade machine that literally kept eating up tokens only to not function, and shocked kids when it did— so i kept trying to explain why i couldn’t exactly do that. but for some reason, it was such a big fucking deal—”

“language.” he chides.

“...fricking deal. of course, i had to be berated for it. i offered to grab them more faz-tokens as compensation and i thought the problem was solved... and then i checked and saw he still left a bad review. definitely gonna hear about that from management.” sun hands you a tool as you continue to speak.

“but now i’m upset, i’m definitely in trouble, and my face hurts from the whole customer service smile i was holding that entire conversation. like seriously, i don’t know how i’m expected to do that 24/7.” you stop at your last remark and stare at sun and his unchanging expression. “...my bad.”

the awkward silence only lasts for a moment, thankfully. you’ve spoken your piece— sun decides to speak his.

“you did your best.” he says simply, as you finally fix the shelf into place. he pats you on the head and doesn't even hide his amusement when you sulk.

“i know that tone, sunny, you're making fun of me—”

“poor thing.” he continues, grinning brightly as he makes a show of patronizing you. sun’s hand continues to pat the top of your head gently, like he would when consoling a child. or when greeting a dog. has he,,, ever seen a dog before? probably not.

you groan and manage to shove his arm away.

“i do mean it though,” he continues, his tone still lighthearted— but notably more earnest as he notes your expression. sun helps you put your tools away neatly back into the toolbox, even though it really is just a one-man job.

“you tried your best,” sun closes the toolbox with a flourish and a click, “...and for that—!”

with a dramatic flick of his wrist, bells jingling as he does, sun produces a gold star sticker from… somewhere. he holds it up for you to see.

and then gently presses it onto the tip of your nose.

“to my favoritest human employee here! and my bestest of friends!” it’s hard to bite back a smile at those words. even if his little show of empathy and affection is much too theatrical for your current mood.

“whatever.” you shrug a little, unable to stop the corners of your mouth from twitching into a little grin. standing up and grabbing the toolbox, you give him an awkward thumbs up.

“thanks. and uh… sorry. for being mean. i guess.”

sun shakes his head dismissively, bouncy and bright as ever. “oh, don't mention it!”

something about his seeming lack of offense towards your prickliness makes you feel even more guilty. still, he gives you a wave as you head out, “bye-bye”-ing happily as you walk away, sticker stuck to your nose and smile on your face like an idiot.

you decide you’ll find a way to make it up to him later. you figure he deserves that much for putting up with everything.

meanwhile, sun is taking mental notes on more stuff to break of whenever you’ve been away for too long. just in case, of course. maybe you’d have more interesting customer encounters to rant about. and hey, you could use the company, couldn’t you?

— reblogs always appreciated!

[thegreatimpersonator]

Ok, I have not paid much attention to the whole tayvis relationship because I just don’t care about her personal life. But seeing your master post…holy shit. I mean we are at a time and place where most people of his stature and wealth are guilty of at least a handful of those things and it’s gotten to the point where it has turned me off from paying attention to anyone above a certain wealth bracket. You get to a certain point and you are so successful, so famous, so far removed from reality, you don’t care about things like bigotry, sexism, racism, etc. because it doesn’t affect you. You only care about what affects your bottom line. So the morals of your friends (or boyfriends for that matter) are also of no consequence. The only thing that matters is if those morals affect your bottom line. Hence people ok with Weinstein until it got them in trouble. All this to say, until we make the right people wealthy, the people who actually have a need to improve the world with their wealth and not just be complacent, I will be leaving my interest in them behind. The argument is that you can find something wrong with everyone and every celebrity so why care. Perhaps. But the truth is there are still some people out there, if you look hard enough, that want to do good with their money and understand how lucky and privileged they are and aren’t ok with how the world treats those less fortunate. So why spend time stanning those whose only remaining purpose in life is to center the earth’s gravitational pull around themselves? People say love is blind. That certain things don’t matter when you truly love someone and you are talking out of your ass when you say you’d dump a friend, family member, boyfriend over morals or ethics. But I’m not. For the first time in a long time I really connected with someone. And anyone who has tried the dating scene in the past decade can tell you it’s fucking hard out there. I thought I had finally found “it”. Till that “it” revealed he had been accused of rape in college but it was just a “misunderstanding”. I don’t regret dumping that hot red flag for a second, even if I remain single forever. I would never be able to live with myself knowing I was against that behavior for everyone except this one guy whose special just cause he gets me. But unfortunately humans can make excuses for just about anything or anyone. You are who you love or keep in your circle. When you excuse it you endorse it. I’m sorry to be so simplistic but that how I feel. I just wish we had more celebrities with actual guts.

Sorry, long winded and rambling but that Travis mega post was truly WILD.

absolutely agree with everything you said, but now imagine you have a problem with people like travis and so you talk about it but then get absolutely relentlessly harassed by a brainwashed, apathetic, hypocritical fandom for months and, simply for having issues with travis and not blindly adoring the ground he walks on, get called things like a 'vibe vampire', 'soul sucking', 'pathetic' 'draining', 'rotten' 'annoying weirdo' and they say things like 'you're not being an activist you're just chronically angry online', 'you just complain about everything, it must be exhausting' and just the constant belittling of your emotions, having to take multiple hiatuses bc the harassment becomes too much, and having to watch as everything that travis gets exposed to is excused, watered down and somehow turned into a positive on why he's such a good person, having crazed fans make whole blogs defending him from any 'hate', and watch people say taylor and him are the perfect couple, and say anyone who doesnt like them must just be miserable and stupid.

that fandom is truly so far from any saving and perfectly encapsulates why celebrity culture has become so rancid. It's also the perfect example of why we're at this point with our politics. normalizing trump supporters, racists, misogynists, etc and making excuses for those who endorse/befriend them. celebrities don't care about you, only your money and the power you have to make them famous. they may be thankful for you but that's not worth throwing any semblance of your morals out the window.

[formulalfc]

I was watching the old hot or not episode where vvd exposed ibou for always sending voice notes and being loud bc of it in the locker room 😂 would you write one where he’s always on the phone with you and gets teased by the rest when they catch him using petnames etc? I love your ibou rambles 💓

thank you so much lovely <3

he's always calling you after training to tell you he's on his way home and usually he gets away with it and manages to call you before all the other boys get in to the locker room. but sometimes he's later in and has to call you in front of them, and they're pissing themselves cause he's so so sweet with you and talking so softly. being all like "i'll be home soon baby, can't wait to see your pretty face, i love you" and the lads are just wheezing cause who knew ibou was like so mega in love with you. most of the time its like trent and dom getting at him and so he's just like calling them jealous cause they don't have girlfriends. but when it's all the guys going at him for it he just takes it cause yeah he's like embarrassingly in love with you and he owns it. he loves your post-training calls too much to ever think about giving them up just cause the lads think he's whipped.

inbox is open send me some ramble requests <3

[pale-opal]

So

What writing projects do you have in the works?

👀

!!!

I am so glad that you asked this question! I honestly have a lot of ideas, and I have been wanting an excuse to talk about them for a while. So if you don't mind me rambling for a little bit:

So the first thing that I've been working on is a sequel to the first fic that I uploaded for this MMX rewrite that I've been working on (an AU called Collision Course). I'm trying to get a backlog of 30 chapters together before I release the second part, and I'm on Chapter 20 right now. I wanted to have it released well before this time, but I kept hitting walls with some of the chapters that came before the current one. However, I think I should be good once I reach Chapter 21 (the story will start to reach a point that I've been really excited to work on). I'm hoping to have it out before the end of the month.

@crystalclear365 and I have started planning for this one fic that we decided to write together - I won't go too far into it because we both want it to be a surprise, so all I will say is that I hope you like cooking shows. >:)

I also like to write essays sometimes, and there's been one that's been sitting in my drafts for way too long. I want to have that out by the end of the month, too (it's been a blast working on it, but I want it gone). I have other ideas for essays past that, but I think it would be best if I finally finished this one first.

I also have a bunch of AUs that I've been mentally workshopping for good while. Here are a few that I want to talk about:

There's a slice of life human + modern AU that involves Shadow Man being neighbors with the Wily family, along with shenanigans such as Bass skipping school on a near regular basis, Piano and Waltz (cut characters from the Megamix manga and the Dreamwave comics respectively) being in girl scouts, Snake Man trying to set Shadow up with Berkana, Star Man being a community theater teacher, Wily being a deadbeat (if there's anything most of my AUs have in common, it's that Wily is a terrible father and Shadow Man will adopt nearly all of Wily's kids if you let him), Zero and X being lab partners, Blues being a runaway... there's a lot going on. I'm definitely going to have to make a proper post explaining this one at some point (and not just because I feel like I'll implode if I don't write something for it soon).

I also have a human + zombie AU that has a bunch of lore, so I can't talk about it too much without giving it its own post - so to sum it up, a bunch of the characters from the Mega Man series got turned into zombies during the apocalypse, got found by some scientists that are being led by Gate, got experimented on, got some of their sentience back while losing some of their zombie-tendencies, and escaped. Now it's everyone else's problem. It features events such as Red learning how to love and be less selfish after half-zombie Axl looks at him one day and goes "Yup. that's my dad now.", Shadow Man adopting half-zombie Zero (because of course he does), Snake Man slowly succumbing to the infection because he took too long to amputate his bite (oof), and Lunime trying to convince all the other former infected to rise up against the humans. And the half-zombies can speak to those that are fully infected, while all the humans get to stand around watching like this:🧍‍♂️

I have a vampire AU I haven't put much thought into. I do have a few details though: Red is Axl's biological father in this one, and Axl is half-vampire (Red is human, though. And an ex-vampire hunter. So he's going through it). Blues is a vampire hunter who is really good at his job, but hates doing it. Shadow Man's family act like rejects from the Addams family. Dr. Light is a retired hunter. I want to write a oneshot for Mouthwashing at some point (I saw a playthrough of it not too long ago and I may never be the same (/pos)), but I'm still working out the main plot beats. There's also a bunch of lore I have for my OCs, but to talk about that would take hours (seriously). I have some other oneshot ideas for the Mega Man franchise as well, but I'm saving those for special occasions (one of them I am saving for April Fool's Day. It is November. Bear with me). But uh... yeah! That's about it. Thank you again for asking! I hope I didn't talk too much. 😅

[conkorse]

Can I ask how you pick your colors? I'm very fascinated by it and how well it works with your style

sure i will try my best 2 explain !!! >_<

typically i start drawing my main subjects on a grey colored background. this makes it so my color range is alot larger than if i sketched and colored on a white/lighter background because the colors that surround your piece will affect how they are perceived. i will attach an example below:

as you can see the drawing on the left (which is a wip i havent posted this drawing yet lulz) heavys skintone changes to match the context of the colors in the background which when you compare that bg to the bg on the right it is much darker in comparison. i also simply wanted to play around with colors coz i try not to restrict myself in any capacity. coloring is the most fun part of drawing to me and part of that fun comes from imposing zero limitations on myself which is why alot of my art has the most stupid ass color combinations u will eva see #live #laf #lov

this is what my drawings typically look like once i finish the actual main subject of the piece as you can see scout n pyro are in a grey void gidbles them. i typically do backgrounds last (which is something i should prbably change up sometime soon) because i tend to create them around the main drawing and it makes it easier for me to make everything more cohesive in the end because i can make the background however i want to fit the main drawing. i do not recommend doing this 24/7 becoz then u will struggle with environmental backgrounds/perspective shit and other stuff which is something i want to get better at but struggle with alot hashtag supaaa mega sad hashtag noob lyfeee

as for coloring itself and choosing colors its really just a combination of experimentation (and by that i mean i go through so much of the color wheel before i decide on something) and intuition. i already have an idea of what looks good together well in mind because well ive spent quite alot of time fine tuning ermmm idk what 2 call it i guess my color sense ??? hallppp but anyways i really recommend not just using bright/neon colors exclusively! the best way to make colors pop is to couple them with more muted ones so the contrast is better evident btwn the two. OH ANDD i tend to try not to use straight up black and white/grey to portray those colors. for example if a character has ermm lets say a white shirt i wont use white or grey colors to depict it but rather maybe a light cyan orrr yellowy green :p

i also overuse textured brushes and patterns in my art alortttt (see abovee) HALP so maybe try that??? i use clip studio paint and there are so many rly awesome textured brushes that i overuse coz they r SUPAAAA epik. IDK im just rambling but your biggest take away from this should be to GO EXPERIMENT!!!!!!!!!!!!! and have fun anddddd mix "ugly" colors 2gether coz u just can never know what will and wont work unless u try :33

ALSO I ALMOST FORGOT play around with this feature in csp if u have it coz its another way i create textures (my heavy mii shown as an example) and here is a link to a tumblr post where i link all of the brushes i use in csp 0 .o I HOPE THIS HELPS SOMEWHAT!!!!!!!!! SOZZZ I AM NOT THE BEST AT EXPLANING >_<

[bondoes-art]

Bon's Natepat planet rambles

(link to the post I made explaining myself, and also fic link if this peaks your interest)

Warning. Long post.

Map :]

Gevaar (hopefully) translates to 'Danger' in Afrikaans.

It was created by their two goddesses, Aanhi and Xynieo. Aanhi being the manifestation of life and prosperity and Xynieo being the manifestation of death and destruction. They are wives and despite them being nearly polar opposites have a very healthy relationship 😌

Creatures called cloud owls are viewed as Aanhi's messengers (They're literally just pure white owls) and magnaroks are viewed as Xynieo's (Giant black birds with serpentine tails, similar to rocs from mythology. They appear dangerous but are actually scavengers 👍) Both are viewed as sacred, and it is believed killing either is a bad omen and misfortune will fall upon you.

Gevaar is divided into 5 main sections.

The Cloud Oak Forest, containing the dragon city of Spire; the Aevis (wingy people) settlement of Fortress; and also, Wyrm Bay, named for being shaped like a draconic's mouth. This is where the fic takes place.

The Spinetooth Mountains, containing the drake cities of Avalanche, Peak, and Plateau; and the Aevis cities of Cove and Summit.

The Storm-Caster Plains, containing the wyvern cities of Moor and Four Water; and several small Aevis villages though due to their primarily nomadic lifestyle they're unlisted.

The Hundred-Scale Sea containing (as the name would suggest) hundreds of rainforest islands of varying sizes, the two largest islands contain the amphithere cities of Palm and Downpour. It is unknown if any Aevis reside here (Aka, I'm not sure if I'll shove any here).

And the aptly named Barren Desert nestled behind the small but towering Border Mountain range. Not much is known about what resides in that small strip of land, the heat often deters any would be adventures (Aka, I have ideas but I'm keeping those to myself >:]).

Also, you all are going to ignore the fact that the desert and mountains are both in the north with completely opposite climates. Maybe it was magic, maybe it was me not initially understanding geography, who knooooows.

Cloud Oak Forest:

The cloud oak forest covers virtually all of Gevaar's southwestern quadrant and is the largest forest on the mega continent. Cloud oaks are massive trees (think like a hybrid between a redwood and a giant sequoia but bigger). Lots of creatures make their homes in the branches and under the shade of these massive trees.

Some creatures are:

While residing all over the planet, the previously mentioned cloud owls primarily reside here.

Bearols. They're like a combination between bears and wolves. Canine face and ears. Body like a wolf but bulkier and more muscular and a stubby tail. They often reside in packs and can be very dangerous if they deem you as food or a threat.

Nagas. Long, flying snakes coming in all colors but black. They have feathered wings, feathered 'necks', feathers running down their spine, and a plume of feathers at the tip of their tails. They'll often be found lounging in the branches of the cloud oaks saving energy or digesting a meal. Naga's are constrictors and opportunistic, many have learned Aevis are often too 'stabby' to try and eat unless they haven't eaten in a while.

Battering rams. Animals vaguely resembling the bighorn sheep of Earth. They have spiked ram horns, dappled coats, and long plumed tails. Both males and females have their signature horns though males have two spurs on the back of each front leg. Form herds with one dominant male. Can be quite formidable in their herds but good eating if you get the upper hand.

Forest hordu. Animals vaguely resembling horses. Often appearing with green tinted coats and striped legs. They have manes running all the way down their back and long, plumed tails. Forest hordu have three pairs of legs, enabling great bursts of speed and agility. Males have spiraling horns adorning their heads, making them slightly dangerous. They appear in herds with one dominant male. Hard to hunt due to their speed.

Foxhawks and cateagles. Mini griffin-like creatures with canine and feline features. Carnivorous but harmless due to their small size.

Glow mice. Small rodents resembling mice of Earth. They have glowing spots on their backs and often have glowing mushrooms growing on their backs that don't seem to bother them. Poisonous due to the mushrooms and are often viewed as pests. Cloud owls are immune to this poison and are the only predators of the glow mice.

Bay serpents. Vegetarian, large eel-like creatures residing in Wyrm Bay, covered with fins. Harmless and edible if you're quick enough.

Sharkodiles. Crocodilian animals with gray ish scales, gills, and dorsal fins on their back. Often found resting on the surface of Wyrm Bay or on the rocky shores. Normally don't bother anyone apart from the season of leafbud (Spring) when they're extremely defensive of their hatchlings.

And of course, plenty more that I haven't spawned yet. Also, a plethora of carnivorous plants. A select few are large enough to eat Aevis and dragon hatchlings, yippie! 👍

There are also a few unnamed creatures that Fortress's Aevis have managed to successfully farm. Wild ones are still found, however.

Dragons are exactly what you think they are. Large reptilians with four legs, a pair of webbed wings, a tail, and some can breathe fire. They're the 2nd largest and most diverse of Gevaar's draconics, able to be any color and have a variety of horn shapes, scale patterns, and back spines. Some dragons have a form of hair on them that is actually a form of modified scales :] They're predominantly patriarchal due to each dragon having a specific mark on their face passed onto hatchlings via their father. The patriarchy chain was broken by their current queen, Queen Rihan. Dragons typically breathe fire, ice, or nothing at all. Some dragons are able to possess a form of magic though they are very rare.

Nate has a dragon, his name is Huivr :) I literally mentioned him in the tags so we fine. My son.

I'm not gonna ramble too much about the Aevis because spoilers so uh... Have the main queer I drew. Showing Nate actually might be spoilers now that I think about it so uh, just the idiot to be safe.

Also don't you love when your beta reader friend says you accidentally reinvented a very rough version of wingy communism for them? They're just given everything and assigned jobs based on wing color. I know the jobs based on wing color sounds weird and dumb and some of the other stuff will as well but there are reasons I'm not giving away yet. So, here's a rundown of the stuff that's revealed in the Prologue and chapter one that I can say:

The Aevis of Fortress are ruled by those with purple wings. Rose Hunter in the Prologue and her son Collin Hunter in chapter one (he's only 19). Rose was believed to have been poisoned but no one is sure by who.

At 16 years of age an Aevis is given their job based on wing color. The are very broad categories and you'll tend to find several subcategories under most branches.

Purple. Leader of course.

Red. Hunter/Butcher, with subcategories.

Orange. Guards, with subcategories.

Yellow. Teachers, with subcategories.

Green. Farmers, with subcategories.

Blue. Fishers, with subcategories.

White. Medics, no subcategories.

Brown. Artisans, many subcategories.

Pink. Only found in female Aevis (don't question how, magic wingy genetics or something) and the only Aevis deemed suitable enough to have children. But... That's a bit of an issue if you stared at Matt's wings.

Multi-colored. Due to the uncommon nature of their wings, they're assigned any job in need of fulfillment at the time. For example, librarian.

Black. Extinct. And as Matt comes to find out, no information can be found. Though, not everything in a book is to be believed.

Aevis are assigned partners sometime in their twenties. With either a pink-winged female and an any colored male. Or both any colored but unpermitted to have children. Partners that can have children are supposed to have one of each gender. But, because at least someone realized that was a bit much giving it's rarely just two and done, they are permitted to stop after four.

And that should be everything before spoiling everything. Moving on! The other regions are much less developed due to not being a main focus. But this is an info dump on the whole planet not just the cloud oak forest.

Spinetooth Mountains:

The Spinetooth Mountains covered 80% of northern Gevaar. It's the coldest reaches of the mega continent, and while not as cold as it could be given the location of it in relation to the planet's norther pole, most of the region is covered in snow for half of the year.

A few creatures make the cold reaches home.

Like the cloud owls, the previously mentioned magnaroks reside all over the planet but primarily reside within the mountains.

Goathorns. Resembling the mountain goats of Earth. Covered in cream colored wool and spiraled icy blue horns these creatures are a staple for drakes and Aevis alike. Its pelt is essential for making clothes to keep the cold at bay and the meat makes for good eating. The horns are often carved into little trinkets.

Ice giants. Ice giants are giant creatures covered in fur and scales. They appear vaguely humanoid in nature, often covered in ice and having a fluffy tail. No one is sure exactly what an ice giant is and legends speculating their origins are told by both Aevis and drakes alike. They walk on the knuckles of their massive hands, and all their fur hides a formidable beast with sharp fangs and tusks. The beasts are known to frequently conflict with the drakes of the region and have won on occasion.

Bodes. They are literally just large toads with rocks on their backs. They get up to about knee height on the average Aevis and live near the base of the mountains. Inedible but harmless.

And that's everything named. Again, less developed.

Drakes are the 2nd smallest of the four draconics. They lack wings but can breathe fire. What they lack in mobility they make up with for sheer strength, 85% of their body mass is pure muscle. They come in varying shades of red, orange, and yellow, typically with some black scales. Their horns are typically like ram horns but can be straight or slightly curved as well. Their eyes also match this theming but rarely their eyes can be an icy blue color. Like Arsonigo!

(I'll bring up the Flame War stuffs later)

Anyway. Drake society is predominantly matriarchal in nature, due to large family sizes being the norm and viewing such as good luck. They are currently ruled by Queen Aniyin. (Also, for some reason I decided to have most drake names start with A... I don't have any explanation for that.)

Again, can't say too much about Cove and Summit's Aevis because that would involve spoilers for some of the main stuff. They are notably more advanced than Fortress, and they are both much larger than it. The two cities are very intertwined, often trading goods and services via ships.

Storm-Caster Plains:

The Storm-Caster Plains is the largest of the five biomes, being nothing more than rolling hills and few trees. Unlike the cloud oak forest and Spinetooth Mountains, where they're divided into the season of leaf bud (spring), full leaf (summer), fallen leaf (fall), and no leaves (winter), the Storm-Caster Plains are divided by weather. Simply the stormy season and the off season. The area is frequently tormented by tornadoes during the stormy season, believed to be caused by the tails of spirits known as Storm-Caster's, hence the name of the plains.

Some creatures are:

Plains hordu. Relatives of the forest hordu, plains hordu have a similar body plan but lack the extra pair of legs and their coats are more natural colored. The Aevis of the region often use them to carry supplies and as an alternative mode of transport.

Rattle horns. Bovine creatures looking like a hybrid between a bison and water buffalo. A staple food source for wyverns and Aevis alike. Look in any direction and you'll likely see a herd in the distance. Just keep your distances from the males and the females with calves.

Perytons. Deerlike creatures possess feathered tails, front bird-like feet, and feathered wings. Live in herds, due to their thin and delicate stature they're relatively harmless and will run instead of fight.

And that's everything named.

Wyverns are the tallest of the draconics. Having their forelegs combined with their wings, curved horns and long, thin tails. Wyverns can breathe fire. They come in varying shades of red, orange, and yellow like the drakes and their eyes can be any color. Wyverns typical also have some kind of pattern running down their backs. Wyverns have no preferred social structure having both kings and queens, they're currently ruled by King Jhen. Rumor has it wyverns used to possess the magic a select few dragons are able to hold and that's why there have been no recorded reports of a tornado tearing apart Moor or Four Water.

Aevis that live on the Storm-Caster Plains tend to be nomadic or live in small villages scattered throughout the plains. Their way of life has no parallels to any of the Aevis residing in Fortress, Cove, and Summit. Most of the Aevis who've chosen a more nomadic lifestyle use plains hordu as a mount or to carry cargo. They live off the land though often settle down for a few months during the calm season.

Storm-Casters are spirits that the inhabitants of the plains believe are responsible for the tornadoes that scar the land. A tornado is believed to be the tail of the spirit, what the Storm-Casters look like varies but that is the one constant. And the larger the tornado, the older the Storm-Caster causing it.

Another rumor that circulates around the plains tells tale of a hybrid draconic and a young Aevis crossing the plains. Why this is a rumor is unclear, some say the draconic claims preposterous things like they don't really exist and that the Aevis will try and convince you as well. Tall tale or not, best to avoid strangers in case they try and drive you insane.

Last off the islands of the Hundred-Scale Sea (this has almost nothing unfortunately):

The Hundred-Scale Sea is a part of Gevaar dotted with hundreds of tropical islands. The two largest islands contain the amphithere cities of Downpour and Palm.

No named creatures inhabit the islands besides the amphitheres.

Amphitheres are the smallest of the draconics, resembling the nagas of the Cloud Oak Forest. Do not call them nagas, they view it as an insult. They are agile flyers, able to fly around the thick jungles they call home. Amphitheres wings act as a set of limbs with modified talons on the end, though most amphithere prefer using their prehensile tails/bodies. Amphitheres have no back legs. While not as formidable as the other three on the surface, amphitheres have to fangs that can spit an acid like venom which quickly eats thorough any living matter. It's best to not get on an amphitheres bad side. Despite this weapon amphitheres are actually completely herbivorous. Amphitheres come in any color and pattern, being nearly as diverse as dragons. Amphitheres are like wyverns and have no preferred social structure. They are ruled by Queen Yonnea.

No known Aevis reside here.

Extras and fun facts.

The previously mentioned Flame War was a war that happened almost 2000 years ago between the four draconics (I haven't come up with a reason for it starting yet lol). The main cities of each draconics have statues honoring their respective commanders. Niyara of the dragons, Arsonigo of the drakes, Nlixia of the wyverns, and Feiro of the amphitheres. Niyara and Feiro are the only two with known living relatives. Perhaps after I'm done with the wingy fic I might write a book centered around it if anyone is interested. To honor the end of the war and to make sure it never happens again the draconics throw a massive party to celebrate. It's most often hosted in Spire.

No one on the mega continent knows if any land exists beyond it, maybe room for more eventual lore?

I was originally inspired by a fic I read on Wattpad back in 6th grade that I can't remember and can no longer find. It just completely spiraled. Here's some old drawings (ew)

Apparently, Nate and Huivr could speak telepathically originally?? I also found original creepy Ruthless looking for these 😭

I tried to incorporate Mare and Phantom in the world but that never stuck and just felt like it was thrown in out of the blue.

Aaaand that's all! If you made it this far thanks for reading and if this piqued your interest go check it out!

Help it has almost 3000 words- WAAAA

[chaotic-goodsir]

Good morning, might I interest anyone in some hyperfixated rambling re:

1) Me being wrong about Wilbur Cross and John Macnamara's canon ages.

2) The newly explained Mega Bastards SaF lore (I know it's just Actor Curt Mega's headcanon but it's canon to me now)

3) The implications for my hcs about Wilbur being the Spankoffski bros uncle and John being related to Curt?

Keeping it under a readmore so I don't annoy everyone about this, because I have a lot of thoughts.

*

So it turns out I misunderstood John and Wilbur's canon ages in Black Friday.

According to the wiki they're around 42 and around 44 respectively in 2019. I'd imagined them as being 10 years older than this and therefore in their early 30s back in 1998, but in fact they should have been only 21 and 23 in that Saf/Hatchetverse crossover fic I wrote a while ago, and they were only 28 and 30 when the portal incident happened.

The question of whether Wiley can physically age post-2005 makes this interesting, though. Was Wilbur 44 in 2005, making Wiley eternally 44? That would mean that pre-portal Wilbur was a whole 15 or 16 years older than John, which works well I guess for the canon mentor-mentee context but not so well for my own MacNaCross headcanons. I think such a big age difference would change their dynamic a lot, plus I prefer the idea of Wilbur having been promoted at a fairly young age for a PIEP colonel.

For those reasons I'm gonna go with Wilbur being 30 in 2005 and Wiley being technically 44 in Black Friday, whether or not he ages in a normal human way. The most tragic implication of this is of course that I can't call Wilbur/Wiley a boomer anymore, since being born in 1975 makes them definitely Gen X :(

But it would also make the age difference between Wil and Annie (a Hatchetfield OC of mine who is Wil's sister and Pete and Ted's mom) much larger. Ted was born in 1984, so Annie would have to be at least 10 years older than Wilbur.

Having a 10 year age difference between the Cross Siblings would be kinda cool (it parallels the Spankoffski bros age difference!!) but it does mean rethinking all my headcanons about their sibling dynamic. Plus it would make Wilbur less than 10 years older than Ted and an actual uncle since the age of 9.

- Implications for my headcanons about where the Uncle Wiley character/voice came from? Perhaps.

- Would Ted have known Wilbur better when he was growing up? Seems more likely, especially if Annie helped her younger sibling out when he left home.

- What about Ted and Wilbur knowing each other around the time of the Jenny incident and the portal? Or when Pete was born in 2002? Or Homeless Ted's reasons for queuing up in Black Friday?

MUCH to consider and perhaps draw or write about some time.

*

Anyway. On a different note:

Combining Actor Curt Mega's headcanon about Agent Curt Mega having several illegitimate children with John and Wilbur's canon ages, it's completely possible (if you like SaF/Hatchetverse crossovers) for John Macnamara to be Curt's grandson.

If John is around 42 in TGWDLM and Black Friday, then he was born around 1976. So his mother or father could easily have been born in the early fifties as one of the illegitimate children resulting from Curt's spy activities. And it's likely John wouldn't know this, if the truth was kept a secret from him - which it probably would be, if his grandmother's line of work/status was the kind where you end up being seduced for espionage reasons by the world's greatest spy.

Again: Much to think about.

[kaylinalexanderbooks]

Bingo Tag Game!

Alright was tagged a few times with this one! Time to just respond to all of them in one mega bingo post!

Thanks to @thepeculiarbird here and here, @mk-writes-stuff here, @buffythevampirelover here, @eccaiia here,

Rules: either go here to make your own bingo AND/OR fill out the bingo of the person who tagged you!

Tagging @badluck990 @gottestod-writes @theeccentricraven @mysticstarlightduck @little-peril-stories @loopyhoopywrites @blind-the-winds @sleepywriter00 @ceph-the-ghost-writer @mjjune @unrepentantcheeseaddict @space-writes @talesofsorrowandofruin or anyone who wants to hop on!

TSP intro

TSP tag list (ask to be +/-): @thepeculiarbird @illarian-rambling @televisionjester @fairy-tales-of-yesterday who can join in the fun if they want

Below the cut:

Filled in Bingo for TSP

Filled in Bingo for Kelsey

Filled in Bingo for Maddie

Filled in Bingo for Noelle

Filled in Bingo for Xitlali

Blank Bingo about SOTL

Blank Bingo about Carla

Version One: WIP Bingo - for TSP

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Yo what why is it most of the board lol

The yellow I marked for "sort of?" But all of the rest definitely happened.

Version Two: OC Bingo - Kelsey Newman

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Well it's bingo if we count the yellow.

I'd call Kelsey a bit neurotic with some anxiety, she would like embroidery, she's polite until she's ticked off and definitely not polite in her head, she is surprisingly good with people when it comes to caring for them, and her cousins are basically her siblings.

Maddie Morgan

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OC in three

Two truths and a lie

Woo, bingo!!!

She would work a physical job but she's eleven

Noelle Bishop

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OC in fifteen

OC in three

Damn! No bingo.

Xitlali Zepahua

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BINGO!

I don't talk about Xitlali enough because I'm not introducing her until Part 3-4 but 4-5 she's super important.

She is allosexual but not ish.

My WIP bingo - SOTL this time

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Already did a Bingo for TSP here

My OC bingo - Carla Baxter

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Two truths and a lie here

You may ignore pronouns as necessary